So there is this drunk guy at a bar...

I am sure you have heard this one before but I promise you it's good! If I have told you this then pleas bear with me, if I haven't then you will enjoy this one!
So I went out with my cousin a few weeks ago to a bar close by. We weren't the youngest ones there by far but we weren't the oldest either. We chose a seat off to the side in a booth where we could chat and people watch. So, here we are in the midst of an involved debate over the pros and cons of thong underwear (important stuff, I know) when some young guy (25-26 yrs old) sits down next to me. He introduces himself then tells us he is a little drunk, he just came from an engagement party. **Warning! Warning! Admittedly drunk youngster... Nothing good can happen!** Anyway, he is talking about relationships, marriage and blah, blah, blah. Then he looks at me and asks, "How old are you, what, 26?" Drunk or not, I take the compliment but I am honest and say, "That is so sweet, but no" "Really? 27?" he bounces back with. "Thanks but no." He keeps going... "28?" "No" "29?" with a little desperation in his voice. "Still no." "30?" "Still sweet, but no." "31?" said with a sound in his voice that was the most desperate I had heard yet. "Yes, I am 31." Then he looked at my cousin and I and said, "Wow, if I am still single at 30 I think I will kill myself."
No lie, I can't make this stuff up! Anyway, after I picked my jaw up off the ground I tried to excuse myself to the bathroom thinking that then he would leave, he didn't. But my cousin let me in on this... "Once you left he said, 'Wow, she is over 30, that is hot. I think she wants me just a little'." Yea, right!!
That goes to show you that there are beer goggles and beer confidence. I hate to break it to this guy but if he keeps spouting off lines like this he may not live to see 30, single or not!