Lucky for me all of the good ones aren't taken...

There has been an ongoing story in the paper about 'The Raven's Fan' who is so dedicated to his team that he has camped out on the roof of a Canton bar and refused to come down (except for an hour a day) until 1- the Raven's win a game or 2- the coach is fired. This was one man's attempt to improve the moral of Raven's fan's across the city. Last I had heard he had stood his vigil for over 2 1/2 weeks in the cold, rain, and snow. What a trooper.
Anyway, in this morning's paper there was a follow up story of the man of dedication... He is in jail for $43K of unpaid child support to his 18 year old child! His ex-wife saw him on the news and in the paper and finally found the dead-beat. What a Goon!! Karma is a bitch, ain't it?

Bad news for the parent of a two year old...

I was skimming the news paper today and found this article about the "Terrible Twos" and the bad news is that it only gets worse when they are three. Ugh! Why doesn't anyone warn us?? Is this a sick joke?
But the light at the end of the tunnel is that once they get to 4-5 years old it is smooth sailing for a few years!

Gym or not to gym...

That is the question! I sit here and ponder that question with days and days of cookies piled high in my belly with pasta and pot roast on top of that. Not to mention the other assorted confections I have dipped into. Needless to say the holidays have not been good to my waistline!
I haven't made it to the gym in about two weeks (or so) due to holiday shopping, a head cold (I am still getting over it), Bug's stomach bug, and work deadlines. Did I mention that it is raining and cold outside and I feel like I only slept for 2 hours last night? You are right, I am making excuses and I probably won't go today but then theres always tomorrow! Then there is next week when all of the fools who haven't been there since last February show up to fulfill their New Year's resolutions. All of the treadmills will be taken and then I will be stuck with a stationary bike, and if you are not used to them, can make certain places pretty soar! Maybe I should just stop going?
What am I crazy? There is this really hot guy (did I mention he has these amazing arms?) there to look at and that in itself is motivation to go. He really is fun to watch, and those arms! On second thought, I really am not feeling that bad and my gym bag is in the trunk. Maybe I will go just long enough to break a sweat!

What Christmas means to me....

Truth be told.... I just wasn't feeling it this year. That warm and fuzzy feeling of Christmas and I had a million reasons why. They weren't my decorations on the tree. Heck, it wasn't even my tree or my house. Different state. Different state of mind. Tighter purse strings. The separation/ divorce. Living with my family. The list goes on and on just like that.
Now I tried, I listened to Christmas music. I sent cards. I even coached Bug on the finer points of baking cookies but none of it seemed to work. While we were sitting at Christmas Eve mass singing "Silent Night" my eyes teared up as I held Bug. I got it and I can't even explain "it" but I got it!!
We went home and watched the Grinch and ate dinner then went to bed. The next morning I sat there and got to enjoy Christmas through her eyes. What a joy! We went to dinner and enjoyed the company of our extended family. At 9 pm we were on our way home with full bellies and happy hearts. And while we stopped at a traffic light with Christmas carols on the radio, I reached around and held onto her fleece covered foot and said, "I love you so much. I am so happy that I got to spend Christmas with you because I know that one day there will be a Christmas I won't be able to spend with you but I am so happy to be here with you today. It is so special to me." I don't know if she understood what I was saying or not but then she said, "Thank you, Mommy."
Maybe that it why I didn't feel it for so long... I was so worried about bills, messes, work, gifts, colds, and everything else that I didn't stop and take time for today. Anyway, I finally got it!

Making new friends...

So I went out with my cousin J last night... What fun! After discussing the evening's events on the way home (at 2am) we both came to the conclusion that this arrangement seems to be working well. Two single gals out on the town and we always seem to have some kind of adventure (luckily, they have only been the good ones so far). Anyway, we went downtown. Why not? She had to pick up a gift down there any so we may as well kill two birds with one stone.

First stop- The Greene Turtle for snacks. Interesting crowd and good crab dip but not a place to stay for most of the night.

Next stop- Max's on Broadway. Great place for beer! When we went in it wasn't too crowded, cozy not shoulder to shoulder. It was nice and we were hopeful to maybe even score a seat... No such luck. Instead we settled for a ledge off to the side with a great view of the bar, perfect for people watching. Moments later we had someone asking us to join he and his friend. What the heck? Why not! We could always leave.

Come to find out they were passing through town on their way back to DC from PA on business and decided to stop in Baltimore. We had a good time hanging out. I love making new friends.

Third (and last) stop- The Waterfront Hotel (aka- the bar they used when they filmed the "Homicide" TV series) Very crowded, good music, good atmosphere... the downer- hard to get to the , oh well, it was late already. Will Hill was playing, pretty good band, I was impressed!

All in all it was a fun night, no angry bachlorettes or obnoxious drunks so that was good! It even looks like J and I my venture to DC for and evening and meet up with our new friends. Another adventure!!

Every girl's worst nightmare...

Or at least this one is right up there with sitting in chocolate while wearing white pants. This one is right off the press.... it just happened about ten minutes ago!!! So I bend down to pick up something (I don't even remember what it is) and RIP!!! Right in the seat of my pants. They are old, cheap jeans that have been abused for a while but still, I am at work and they are the only ones I have! Oh yea, I decided that thongs would be a good choice today... maybe not.
It is not that bad, about an inch tear near the seam towards the bottom of the inseam but OMG! I am at work! So I sit here with a temporary fix of clear packing tape on the inside of my pants praying that it doesn't get worse or that I forget and make it worse. Why can't stuff like this happen at home?? Uugh!!
UPDATE... It has been a few hours and I can tell you that the rip hasn't moved however, packing tape and girlie parts do not mix!!!

My visitor in the shower...

So I was in the shower this morning shaving my legs, like most other mornings (except for the shaving my legs part, it is December, I am single... give me a break), and then the door swings open. I wasn't startled, I heard the thud, thud, thud of little feet approaching so I was ready for it. The curtain swings open and "I see you!" from Bug. "I see you too!" I reply. "Honey, please close the door." I don't care if she is in there or not but did I mention it was December??? Anyway, here is the rest of the conversation...
"Mommy, what doing?"
"Shaving my legs."
"I shave leg."
"No honey, not for a few years."
"Mommy's boobies."
"Yes, those are Mommy's boobies."
"I got boobies."
"Yes honey, you do."
She disappears out of sight and reappears with a tampon, holding it victoriously...
"Dis Mommy's"
"Yes, that is Mommy's"
"It for your mouth, put in mouth" as she puts it in her mouth.
Loss for words.... "Ok, please put it back"
So I tell my father about the exchange with a chuckle and then he tells me that my cousin (male) used to call them beach whistles. Hmm!

Eating habits of a toddler...

As anyone knows, telling a toddler what to eat (and having them listen) is close to impossible. Just this morning I woke up early and made Bug a scrambled egg with cheese, normally a favorite but due to holiday ciaos breakfast have been yogurt, Cheerios, and juice lately. She took one look at it and said, "No, me no like. No want." Then handed them to the dog. And yes, we end up eating Cheerios, yogurt, and juice... again.
So, here is where I give props to the chef who created the menu at Cafe Hon. As I skimmed the kids menu the other day I noticed the 'toddler plate' which included: 2 slices of American cheese, 1 slice of white bread, cucumber slices, French fries, and a pickle. Brilliant, must have been a mother!!

Joy in someone's misfortune...

I have to admit this... I laughed to myself on numerous occasions this past weekend and it was at someone else's expense. Now before you go persecuting me, let me explain. My ex is vain, very vain, very, very vain. I knew this while I was with him and I got past it most of the time. Oh, the things we do in the name of love! But now that it is over, I laugh, a lot!
Anyway, he was visiting for the holidays and the minute I saw him I just smiled. Not one of those endearing ones that says, "I am so glad to see you." It was one of those "He he, You put on about 15-20lbs since the last time I saw you (2 months ago) Ha, ha, and you look really bad!!" smiles. Now mind you, this is the guy that was happy to loose weight at any cost (that didn't require effort) so when he lost it due to serious 'stomach issues' he was thrilled! I know, I know I am being really shallow. But it only got better when he kept checking himself out at every mirror we passed. Is it possible to love yourself that much? Hey, at least I don't have to deal with that anymore!! I really am the lucky one!

So, two sober women walk into a bar...

... And a drunk guy asks me if I will marry him for the weekend. I say, "What the hell! I don't have any plans!" We all laugh and I turn to order a drinks and next thing I know he is giving me a hug from behind telling all of his friends to go on without him and that his wife over there will kill him when they get home!
Now here is the funny part... not only was he old enough to be my father but I was with my ex's mom, she was the other sober one!!

Sometimes a song just says it so much better...

On my way into work today decided to live on the edge... I was not going to listen to my normal NPR morning show, I would listed to music. And having lived in the south for over a decade I have grown quite fond of country music (hey, don't knock it). So, I concluded, that would be my poison for the day.
I tuned into the local station mid song, they were playing Little Big Town's "Bring It On Home". A very cozy and almost sexy song about feeling safe in someone's arms. Like every country song it is a story and this one is a man saying that he will be your safe harbor and he will be there when you fall asleep and when you wake. Now maybe it was the remnants of a migraine or my sappy self but I got teary-eyed and damn it! I want that!
I know that Mr. Right is out there and when I am ready, I will meet him. No need for the pep talks, I have heard them all before! I don't have to compromise or lower my standards but this is the lonely part... I guess this is the part that no one talks about. Then to make it ever worse they start talking about hard and trying times during the holidays... divorce, job losses, poor health, etc. Man, talk about a downer!! I am not going to let this one get me down (not for long at least) I have my daughter, my family, fantastic friends, a great job, and a good dog that only licks her butt sometimes! I do try to count my blessings.
So anyway, I am at work and I want to know more about this song I heard so I go to my standby cdnow.com to do some research and I eventually stumble upon a song, I am sure you have heard it at some time, "We Just Disagree" by Dave Mason. Don't ask how I know it, I just do! It is like an old friend and I start humming the lyrics while sitting at my desk. That gets me thinking of my ex, all of the lyrics just fit. And when I say thinking of him, not in a 'I miss the past' kind of way, no regrets here! It was in a 'what will be' kind of way. It is not like breaking up with a boyfriend, it is a lot more than that. He will always be in my life, we share a child and that is never going to change. But can we ever be friends? Not today, I assure you.
Now here is the million dollar question for the day... What will happen? Hey, your guess is as good as mine!

So there is this drunk guy at a bar...

I am sure you have heard this one before but I promise you it's good! If I have told you this then pleas bear with me, if I haven't then you will enjoy this one!
So I went out with my cousin a few weeks ago to a bar close by. We weren't the youngest ones there by far but we weren't the oldest either. We chose a seat off to the side in a booth where we could chat and people watch. So, here we are in the midst of an involved debate over the pros and cons of thong underwear (important stuff, I know) when some young guy (25-26 yrs old) sits down next to me. He introduces himself then tells us he is a little drunk, he just came from an engagement party. **Warning! Warning! Admittedly drunk youngster... Nothing good can happen!** Anyway, he is talking about relationships, marriage and blah, blah, blah. Then he looks at me and asks, "How old are you, what, 26?" Drunk or not, I take the compliment but I am honest and say, "That is so sweet, but no" "Really? 27?" he bounces back with. "Thanks but no." He keeps going... "28?" "No" "29?" with a little desperation in his voice. "Still no." "30?" "Still sweet, but no." "31?" said with a sound in his voice that was the most desperate I had heard yet. "Yes, I am 31." Then he looked at my cousin and I and said, "Wow, if I am still single at 30 I think I will kill myself."
No lie, I can't make this stuff up! Anyway, after I picked my jaw up off the ground I tried to excuse myself to the bathroom thinking that then he would leave, he didn't. But my cousin let me in on this... "Once you left he said, 'Wow, she is over 30, that is hot. I think she wants me just a little'." Yea, right!!
That goes to show you that there are beer goggles and beer confidence. I hate to break it to this guy but if he keeps spouting off lines like this he may not live to see 30, single or not!

The Santa threat...

So, I did it last night. We were in the grocery store, I have been there a lot lately but that is for later. Anyway, Bug was acting a fool and I had a bad day so I pulled out the big guns... I reminded her that Santa is watching and he only brings toys to little girls that listen to their mommies. It worked, it was a miracle! She sat down, quiet and attentive. It lasted all of five minutes, damn those short attention spans!! But when she acted up again and all I had to do was mention Santa, it was brilliant. I must have used it 10 times in one trip to the grocery store. Yes it was an abuse of power but I couldn't help it, it was amazing. Nothing has ever worked like that before!
I always promised myself I would never do this but just like the "I will never give my child fast food" didn't last (now it is only used in a pinch) so too has this promise to myself. Lets face it, I am only human. Anyway, now that I know the power of Santa I will use it sparingly and when absolutely necessary but it sure does bring new meaning to "I wish every day was Christmas!"

I have been up since 4am...

I am exhausted!!
I was woken up by a vomiting toddler this morning. Used hot dogs and strawberry applesauce were all over her bed and lovies. And that, my friend, was the end of my peaceful dreams. We got up, changed clothes, washed up, and ran laundry. By 4:40 I thought there was a smidgen of hope of napping for an hour... Ha! The joke was on me. Bug didn't want to sleep at all! She wiggled and giggled, sang and searched for the dog. She was happy as a pig in a poke!
She is fine (maybe a little tired) and at school and here I sit at my desk with my brain only half functioning. Maybe I am losing my mind? Is this what it feels like? Who knows, but if it is... I just wish I could have had a nap first!

I found you...

This morning we were rushing out the door, like every other morning and after wrestling my little one into her seat Bug proclaims, "I found you!" Just out of the blue, "I found you!" So I respond, "No, I found you!" Bug replies, "No Mommy, I found you!!" Well we went back and forth like that for a minute until I gave up and she won. She found me, I don't know where I was hiding or where I was but she found me. Random toddler talk, right?
So, after I dropped her off at school I chuckled to myself and got a little sentimental then it hit me... She does find me. When I feel lonely, she finds me. When I feel lost or overwhelmed, she finds me. When I am sad, she finds me and brings me back.
So I guess, lucky me, she did find me!!

My First Post...

Hey there!

Well, for starters I guess I should introduce myself. I am 31, single, and mother of a toddler. My husband left me for another woman almost a year ago so we left town, much easier that way. We moved home for a new beginning. New job, new school, new life!

My daughter is two and a drama queen, but then again what toddler isn't! I love her, she is my world and the best thing that came from my marriage (that and a few hard learned lessons). That being said, she puts up with me and my craziness, lucky me. So it looks like we will keep each other! She is headstrong, smart, fiercely independent, and like me in more ways than I want to admit. She is also beautiful, but I will take that one!!

Let me catch you up to speed on my love life... I have started dating again, and not very successfully I might add. My first date was with "Rusty" and well, in hindsight, it was painful! He barely spoke and to top it off he kissed like a dead fish. And I am not just saying that because he was the only other man I kissed in the past nine years, he really did!! I don't think I need to clarify but that was the first and last with him! Then there was the teacher, I met him at a bar, I had a few a drinks, was feeling rather full of myself and gave him my number when he asked. Much better kisser than the last. We saw each other for a few months then with my luck once I really started to like him he stopped calling me. I thought that adults talked about things like that, right? Wrong! I guess dating hasn't changes all that much in the past 10 years. Again hindsight being 20/20 it was a good thing. He was way too single, yes, there is such a thing. I think I may be done licking my wounds from that one now.

So here I am, on the market, again. The only difference is that I have a few more carry-ons now. This will be an interesting journey for my daughter and I. There are no instruction manuals or guidelines. Heck, I seem to be the only one in my 'situation' that I know of so it makes it even a little lonely sometimes. But hey, we will get there!